I woke up early feeling depressed because it was my birthday, and thought, "I'm another year older," but decided not to dwell on it. So I showered and shaved, knowing when I went down to breakfast my wife would greet me with a big kiss and say, "Happy birthday, dear."

All smiles, I went to breakfast, and there sat my wife reading the newspaper as usual. She didn't say one word. So I got myself a cup of coffee and thought, "Oh well, she forgot. The kids will be down in a few minutes they will sing 'Happy Birthday' and have a nice gift for me."

There I sat, enjoying my coffee, and I waited. Finally the kids came running into the kitchen yelling, "Give me a slice of toast. I'm late. Where is my coat? I'm going to miss the bus." Feeling more depressed than ever, I left for office.

When I walked in, my secretary greeted me with a great big smile and a cheerful, "Happy birthday, boss." She then asked if she could get me some coffee. Her remembering my birthday made me feel a whole lot better.

Later in the morning, my secretary knocked on my office door and said, "Since it's your birthday, why don't we have lunch together?"

Thinking it would make me feel better, I said, "That's a good idea."

So we locked up the office, and because it was my birthday, I said, "Why don't we drive out of town and have lunch in the country, instead of going to the usual place?" So we drove out of town and went to a little out-of-the-way inn and had a couple of martinis and a nice lunch.

We started driving back to town when my secretary said, "Why don't we go to my place, and I'll fix you another martini?" It sounded like a good idea because we didn't have much to do in the office. So we went to her apartment and she fixed some martinis.

After a while, she said, "If you'll excuse me, I think I'll slip into something more comfortable," and left the room. In a few minutes, she opened her bedroom door and came out carrying a big birthday cake. Following her were my wife and all my kids. And there I sat with nothing on but my socks.