"May I Speak to Ben, Please?

It was another boring Wednesday night, and I was sitting in my room watching television, when the phone rang.

"Hello?"

A girl's voice came over the line.

"May I speak to Ben, please?"

I live by myself, and my name definitely is not Ben. It was probably a wrong number. Of course, it was also a dull evening.

"I'm sorry, he's not in right now. Can I take a message?"

"Do you know what time he'll be back?" she responded.

"I think he said he'd be home around ten o'clock."

Silence on the other end, a confused silence. I had a live one.

"Is this Steve?"

My name isn't Steve, either. This was definitely a wrong number.

"Yes, it is. Do you want to leave a message for Ben?"

"Well, he said he would be home tonight and asked me to call him..." she said in a slightly irritated voice.

I must have sounded a lot more like Steve than I had thought.

I replied, "Well, he went out with Karen about an hour ago and said that he would be back at ten o'clock."

A shocked voice now: "Who's Karen?!"

"The girl he went out with." (I've seen Fletch several times).

"I know that! I mean...who is she?" (She must have seen Fletch, too.)

"I don't know her last name. Look, do you want me to leave a message for Ben?"

"Yes, please do. Tell him to call me when he gets home."

She was pretty irate at this point, and I could hear her temper flaring. Now would be a good time to call an end to the charade.

"I sure will. Is this Jennifer?"

She exploded this time. "WHO'S JENNIFER?!"

Apparently she wasn't.

"Well, he's going out with Jennifer at ten o'clock. I thought you were her. Sorry. It was an honest mistake."

"Ben's the one who's made the mistake! Tell him that ALICE called him and that she's VERY UPSET and that I would LIKE HIM to CALL ME as SOON AS HE GETS HOME."

I smiled and said, "Okay, I will... but Becky isn't going to like this."

"BECKY!?"

*click*