A drunk was staggering down the main street of town. Somehow, he managed to make it up the stairs to the cathedral and into the building, where he crashed from pew to pew. He finally made his way to a side aisle and into a confessional.

A priest had been observing the man's sorry progress. Figuring that the fellow was in need of assistance, he proceeded to enter his side of the confessional. His attention was rewarded only by a lengthy silence.

Finally, the priest asked, "May I help you, my son?"

"I dunno," came the drunk's voice from behind the partition. "You got any toilet paper on your side?"