An Aussie tourist arrived in New Zealand, rented a car, and set off for the wilderness. On his way, he saw a bloke having sex with a sheep. Deeply horrified, he pulled up at the nearest pub and ordered a straight scotch.

Just as he was about to throw back the drink, he saw a bloke with one leg masturbating furiously at the bar.

"God!" he cried, "What the heck is going on here? I've been here for an hour, and I've seen a bloke banging a sheep and now some bloke spanking himself at the bar!"

"Fair go, mate," the bartender told him, "you can't expect a man with one leg to catch a sheep."