A rich old dowager is dining in a fine restaurant. Bending down in her chair to get the something from her purse, she accidentally farts (quite loudly) as the waiter walks up.

Sitting up straight, embarrassed, red faced, and knowing that everyone in the place heard her, she turns to the waiter and regally demands, "Stop That!"

The waiter looks at her dryly and says, "Sure, lady, which way is it headed?"