With modern medical conveniences coming into Russia since the USSR's breakup, many Russians still have to learn how to do things that westerners understand from modern culture.

One Doctor working in an outback part of the country was visited by a old Russian man with severe constipation. Being in a hurry, the doctor gave the poor Russian some suppositories and sent him away with a scheduled checkup in three days. Three days passed and the old Russian man arrived back at the doctors.

"So how did those work for ya?" -- the doctor asked.

The old Russian, with a look of disgust replied: "Doctor! They tasted like shit; They stuck in my throat; and for as much good as they did me, -- I might as well have shoved them up my ass!"