A chap comes home with some multi-flavored condoms to spice up the long winter nights. He comes in, throws off his coat, and announces it to his missus, who becomes immediately excited. Without a word, she grabs him by the nuts and drags him upstairs. He jumps into bed, and she runs off to the bathroom to powder her nose.
While he is lying in the bed, hands behind his head, the wife comes in. She strips at the foot of the bed and slides up under the bedding and starts playing the pink oboe.

Suddenly, she lifts the bedding and says to her husband "Mmmmm, cheese and onion?"

To which he replies, "No, hang on a minute. I haven't put one on yet!"